I have recently come to the conclusion that making friends is too hard. I don't really have any, and my adviser says it's because I need to connect to people that I have things in common with.
Here's my problem:
I don't have any things in common.
There are things I enjoy doing, and sometimes for as long as a month, I'll be really excited about a project... But to join a club and be expected to be at a specified location every second Tuesday at 7:15 to discuss some specified interest while having coffee (which I shouldn't drink after 2:00) or cookies and punch or whatever it is that interested people imbibe while they are sharing interests seems like too much of a commitment to me.
I also tried having pen pals. I would contact random people on Craigslist and compliment them on their posts. I developed a pseudo-friendship, but then I had no internet and no smartphone, so there went that one. Everything I wanted to write after I got internet seemed insincere and forced.
I have surface friends, like- people I enjoy being around who I'll send a text to or compliment their hair, but as far as close friends go, I have a limited number. 2 are ex-boyfriends and one lives in Brazil and I've never met him in real life.
My problem is that I want a friend that doesn't always want to drink- I'm no religious fanatic, nor am I a coin carrying AA member, I just don't find the merit in constantly being too drunk to think... Nor do I always want to shop. Like, let's go to Wal-Mart together, but not spend 6.5 hours in the mall trying on jeans and insulting our butts (I happen to like my big butt). I also want that person to inherently know who Holmlock Shears is, or at least have read a Sherlock Holmes novel before Benedict Cumberpatch made him the sexiest detective to ever grace a TV screen. I also require that this person doesn't want to sleep with me. Usually if a guy agrees to hang out and watch True Blood or whatever it may be, it's probably because he thinks eventually, you will get naked with him.
I just want someone that I can go places with, that we don't have to be interested in the same things, but we are interested in what the other person is saying just for the fun and nonsense, and I don't want that person to be my significant other. Or we can just sit and hate the world together on shitty, rainy days... Or take up jogging together and then quit together because muffins are just better tasting than upper lip sweat. Or eat cheese fries and drink mountain dew and play video games together without them needing to smoke weed first.
I guess it isn't hard to make friends at all, I'd just need to meet a sincere human being that isn't addicted to alcohol, TV, sex, or fashion. Or I could just take people for what they are and stop making excuses, but all my pity parties have cake. Delicious, delicious cake.
